Shades of the Silent: Thicker Than Water

[aithne]

6/28/1221
Haerbin, China

Haerbin was a small town. It had been nestled into a forested valley, with a small river running through the center, once. Now, the forest around it had been cleared for miles, a sea of stumps. The valley had been almost totally deforested, except for the spindly trees that weren't worth cutting. The sounds of chopping could be heard for miles around.

"Let's go in, get some supplies, see what there is to be seen, make sure the brotherhood's not waiting for us," I said. The rest followed me in. I was looking male, still, a different face than I had been using, so I was in the lead.

Everyone in town was staring at us as we rode in. The skin at the back of my neck crawled, but nobody seemed to be offering us harm. So far, at least.

It was a rough place. Whores casually catcalled us from the windows of buildings, muscular men strode down the street, glaring at us. There was a lot of alcohol of various types flowing, even though it was only mid-morning.

We needed a few things anyway, and stopping to resupply would provide a reason to talk to someone here. We found a spot where we could tie the horses, and a building that looked like it sold grain and other staples during the day. The person manning the shop was a big guy who didn't seem terribly happy to see us. I negotiated for some grain, and as I was paying him, I commented, "I suppose you folks don't see much for visitors around here."

"Nope, you are the first in a long while," he said. "Looking for work?"

I scratched the back of my neck. "Might be. Depends on what there is for work around here. Mostly logging, looks like."

"Yep, loggers, splitters, and river boat people are what they are hiring for."

I shrugged. "Might have to talk to the loggers. Tell me, does a guy named Wahb live up here anywhere?"

The guy pointed. "Sure, what's left of him is right over there."

I turned. In the corner of the store, in a chair, sat a man with vacant eyes and with a bucket tied to his chin to catch the stream of drool that ran from both corners of his mouth. He was a bit younger than my father, a man of late middle years with the look of a man once spectacularly muscled and now run to fat. He rocked back and forth.

"Hunh," I said to cover my dismay. "Might be the same guy my father told me about. Tree fall on his head?"

The storekeeper shook his head. "Nope, some guy showed up, asked him to make him a box. Right after that he went mad. Killed his wife, all his children, all with an axe. Then he fell down and started drooling. He only says a few words over and over. Kamil, Yesui and Axe. At least that's all that makes sense to me."

I considered the man in the chair. "Yesui? That's a name I've heard recently."

"Really, wonder who that is. Sounds Mongol or something."

I snorted indelicately. "Some Mongol girl who's got the Khan's panties in a bunch. The Mongols, when I left, were sitting around Beijing muttering about her. We left when we realized they were planning to lay siege to the city."

"Damn Khan," the guy muttered. "Well, he a relative?"

"Old friend of my father's," I said, shrugging. "I think, anyway. My dad never talked about him except when he was drunk. Thought I'd look him up since I came this way. Can I borrow him? Maybe I can get through to him."

"Be my guest," the shopkeeper said. "Not like he does anything useful, just takes up space."

I nodded and turned to Wahb. "Help me with him," I muttered to Sacha. I looked over my shoulder. "Is there a place to sit down out back?"

"Just the back steps. Through that door." The shopkeeper pointed, and I nodded. Sacha and I got Wahb out the back door, then sent Sacha to get the others. After they arrived, I sat down next to him.

"Greetings, Wahb. Can you tell me anything about the box you made?"

He didn't look at me. He was still drooling as he mumbled, "Kamil, Yesui, Axe."

"What about the axe?"

"Kamil, Yesui, Axe."

"Tell him who you are," Zayd suggested.

I nodded. There were a few drunks about fifty feet away, paying a lot more attention to their cups than me. "Sacha, when those guys over there aren't looking, take this form. I'm going to take my own shape for a second." He nodded, and when the drunks were looking away, he shifted. I shifted as well, to my original form.

"Zayd, if you could block their view of me? Thanks." Zayd moved so that he was blocking me from view. Then I leaned over to Wahb. "Wahb, I am Yesui. What do I need to do to destroy the box?"

Recognition flickered in his eyes, and he turned. Haltingly, he reached up to touch my face. "Yesui, Axe, north, manbats, thorn, infected, Box, Destroy."

I considered the words. "Yes, we think the thorn creates the bat-creatures. Do you know where the axe is?"

"North, manbats."

Aha! "Well, then. We'll just have to go get it." I glanced at the others. "Sounds like that axe is guarded by some of Kamil's creatures."

"Me," Wahb said. "Town, all."

I blinked. "Oh. Well, that changes things."

Wahb thrust his hand at me, palm-up. There was a large scar on his wrist. "Thorn."

"Can it be removed?" I asked.

"No, die."

I pressed my lips together. "And Kamil knows everything that someone with a thorn in them knows?"

"Control. No know."

This was a very odd conversation, but it was yielding some good information. "Ah. Tolui controls you, or someone else?"

"Tolui, yes. Kamil, yes. Same."

I inclined my head. "I know." I glanced up at the others. "We need to leave here. Now."

Wahb said, "Fight, Drool. No fight. Fine."

I took a sharp breath. "Everyone who is walking around whole isn't fighting the control. We're surrounded, more or less."

"Help, please." He grabbed my hand, his eyes pleading.

"I will. I promise," I said, meaning it with every fiber.

"Yesui, good, take. Me."

"I was just coming to that conclusion. I'm going to change shape, don't be alarmed." I shifted shape, now looking like Sacha had before he had changed to my disguise. "Let's take a walk, everyone. Back to the horses."

We went around the house, Wahb shuffling determinedly among us. I helped him mount, putting him on Wind, who eyed him curiously and switched her tail. We rode west out of town. We had gotten some looks as we left town, but nobody made a move to stop us.

Tree stumps lined the road. The lack of cover was making me itchy all over, and the sounds of the loggers chopping trees wasn't helping my mood any. We finally found cover, but to get to it we needed to pass through a line of loggers. We did, finally, and fortunately without incident.

After we passed through the line, we turned north and to the east. Wahb pointed at a hill that was sticking up in front of us, standing alone, mostly covered with trees. We made our way towards it. As the mountain drew closer, Temur pulled up and pointed at something on the ground. Bones, picked clean as a whistle. "Animal," he said. "Deer, likely." But farther on, the human bones started, clean skulls staring up at us with empty sockets.

It just got worse as we headed up the hill. The sun was going to set in a few hours, and I wanted us and the horses under cover before it did so. I thought that night was not going to be a good time to be out on this mountain.

We started up the main ascent to the hill, and Temur pulled up. I followed his gaze and saw a figure hanging in a tree. It looked like a bat, but it was the size of a man. It was apparently asleep. Temur motioned me toward him, and Spirit moved in response to my thought, towards him. "The bones are women and children, no men. I can kill it from here if you want."

I looked at the bat-creature critically. Manbats, Wahb had said. "Is there a chance you can bring it down without killing it?"

"Pair of arrows in the wings should bring it down." His voice was low and tense. "Might be more though and it will probably scream."

"Kill it. We don't want it to alert the others."

Temur nodded sharply, and in one motion freed his bow from the saddle and pulled an arrow from the quiver on his back. A heartbeat later, and the creature dropped to the ground with a crunching thump, dead.

Spirit walked forward so I could see the manbat. The wings splayed out, looking very much like the bats I had hunted as practice when I was a child. It wore shreds of clothing, looking like it had been a logger, once. There were large claws on its feet and at the major joint in its wings, sharp as daggers. It looked like it could use that joint as a hand, grasping things. The open mouth revealed long teeth. Its nose was blunted, batlike, but the eyes were still quite human.

I dismounted smoothly, dragged it quickly under cover so it couldn't be seen from the air. Then we continued. As we rose higher, there were more bones, and more manbats. Temur felled each of them silently. Finally, Wahb pointed towards a notch in the hillside. Looking, I could see dozens of the creatures in the notch. I dismounted, motioned for everyone to do the same. Without me asking, Nomolun and Sacha herded the horses back a bit, into the brush, and came back.

While they were doing that, I stared at the notch. The creatures had women and children tied to the posts. I could hear a thin, constant wail. It was coming from one of the children. One of the creatures, apparently the leader, was using an axe to chop off parts of the bound people. It would take a bite and then throw the body part over its shoulder to the rest, who crowded and chittered and shoved each other, jockeying for the best position.

I watched, and as I watched, a plan began to form in my mind. "I think we're going to need to pose as them in order to get that axe away from them," I said in a low voice.

"And Wahb?" Nomolun asked.

"One of us will need to stay here with him. What we need is a distraction, something they'll all be interested in attacking. I can manage an illusion that of attackers. Only one of the arrows needs to be real."

"You want me to take out the axe one?" Temur asked.

I nodded abruptly. "That's what I was thinking. I'll give them a bunch of targets to attack, and you can be on Spirit. Sacha, Zayd, and I can get the axe and get out in the confusion. At least, I hope it'll be confusion. The other option we have is to see if the power of the cup will work on the leader, and revert him. The others might well attack him if he was changed back to human. Getting in to touch him shouldn't be hard, if we look like one of them."

There was a motion beside me, and I started and turned as Wahb grabbed my arm. "Take box, destroy," he said urgently.

"If I wield the axe, the axe will destroy the box?" I asked.

"Yes, may kill manbats."

"Might. Might do something else. In that case, I think casting an illusion of them being attacked, killing the one that holds the axe, and using the confusion to destroy the box will work. I'll need to start out closer to them than we are now, because I need hands to cast with. Temur, how close do you need to be?"

"Here is fine. I can watch Wahb."

I looked at Temur. Looked at the notch. Looked back at Temur. That shot was three hundred yards if it was an inch. Temur seemed confident, and I'd never seen him miss a shot. "I'll trust you on that. Zayd, Sacha, Nomolun, we go in separately. You join them as the bat-creatures. I'll sneak in close, cast the illusion, which will be Temur's cue to shoot the leader. One of you grab the axe and bring it to me. Sound good?"

Everyone nodded. I took a breath. "All right. Lets do this before it gets too much darker."

Sacha, Zayd, and Nomolun and I worked our way towards the notch, the other three transforming as we went down. They joined the shove and shuffle, disappearing into the crowd. I closed my eyes, visualized, and then opened my eyes and began to cast.

All around the notch, men rose up, firing arrows and rushing the group with axes. Most of them had the faces of people I'd seen in the village. The chaos was immediate; four arrows impacted on the leader's throat almost all at once, making a cross at the front of his throat. Nomolun--at least I thought it was Nomolun--grabbed the axe and flew over me, dropping it at my feet. In a fluid motion, I grabbed the axe, set the box down at my feet, and brought the head of the axe down on it.

The box split in half, and light poured from it. I closed my eyes, but it was bright enough that I could see it even through my closed eyelids. The noise from the manbats ceased immediately. When I opened my eyes, after the spots went away, I saw that the creatures had gone, the dead had gone, and even the bones had gone. There were live women and children hanging on the posts, and they were all whole, all healed.

Everything was silent for a moment. Then one of the children whimpered, and I heard the cry of a bird from somewhere nearby. The sound seemed to make the scene start in motion once more, and I headed to the people, intending to get them down.

A sound from behind me made me turn. Temur was walking toward me, Wahb at his side. "Seems normal now," Temur said to me.

Wahb, for his part, ran the last few steps to me, catching me up in a bear hug. I hadn't quite realized how big the man was, or how strong he was even how. He lifted me right off my feet, and I squeaked as he said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"You're welcome," I said, a bit dismayed. "Trust me, I had as much of a reason as you for destroying it."

Wahb let me down, releasing me, and I took a grateful breath. "I understand. But it's a relief not to be trapped by that thing." He was grinning from ear to ear.

"I bet," I told him. "Let's get these folks down and figure out where they're from, so we can take them back. We need to be on our way, we'll have attracted attention."

"I am sure most of them are prostitutes, and some are wives and children of the loggers."

I nodded. "We can at least take them back close to Haerbin, then. If everyone there is still controlled by the thorn, they'll be out for blood, and we'll need to vanish."

We got them down, and made our way back to Haerbin. By the time we got there it was full dark, the moon rising to illuminate our path. I'd expected music, roistering, rowdy drunks. Instead, we were met with silence.

The town was empty. Everyone was gone. The manbats were gone. "Looks like the box's effect was more than strictly local. Wonder where everyone went." My skin was crawling; recent bad experience in Beijing had me on edge. "Wahb, were there any other people who were fighting the thorn, like you were?"

"Not many. A few. I can find them."

I let out a breath. "Well, at least we're probably all right to stay the night, then."

"I think so, most look like they were killed in the wash of energy."

"Good thing for us, otherwise we'd be running with most of the people here chasing us. Let's go find your people." I shifted back to my usual disguise, and we hunted out the few people who were left. A double handful, including the people who'd been used as food.

We cleared out a deserted house, and spent the night there. Before we retired, I went out on Spirit to see if I could feel where the bell was. Unfortunately, all I was getting was Beijing. When I got back, a meal had been prepared, and Zayd handed me a bowl as I came in. "So where to next?" Sacha asked.

"We have two real possibilities. We need to go to Beksdash, on the Caspian Sea, to destroy the Eye. That's months away, but Lhasa is on the way and we could pick the candle up at the same time. The other possibility is a trip south, to Taiwan. That's less appealing right now, considering that the Mongol army is between here and there. The bell is still out there in the world somewhere, but I can't tell where until we get out of range of the two artifacts my father and brother carry. If we head west, we effectively vanish for months."

Zayd asked, "Is that it, then? Just three more?"

I nodded. "Just three more out there. The statue, arch, branch, box, mask, and dulcimer have been destroyed. We changed the cup and the candle. We carry the eye and the snake. The gloves are with the Khan and the thorn is with Tolui. The bell is the last one I know of. That's thirteen."

He sat back, put his bowl down. "That's it then. Well, I have one of those ideas that I will let you ponder. You ready for this?"

I grinned. "Sure, what?"

"So, two items near your father. The Khan is expecting to be attacked again, but Tolui isn't. Not him directly. He probably doesn't know that we know he has an item."

"No, he has no reason to know, really. So we...sneak into the Mongol camp and kill Tolui? Or wait until he decides to strike out on his own? No guarantee he'll stay with the Khan. Or...hm. We could probably lure him here. If we wanted to."

"Either way. We have the advantage of shapeshifting for another couple of months. He may come here if we wait. He has lost contact with these people. All of them all at once."

I rubbed my earlobe. "That's what I was thinking. He'll want to see what happened, and he's probably pretty sure I was involved. In fact--I think it's time we checked in with Mungke."

Zayd nodded. "He will probably travel light, flying here if he is a bat thing. So we might be able to take him with some traps set."

"He'll think we've taken off, not be waiting for him." Zayd's smile was fierce, and I found myself returning it. My mind lighted gently on the fact that this was my brother we were talking about, and I shoved the thought away.

"Right," Zayd said. "Sound like a plan? Mungke can tell us if he moves or is just sitting."

I watched him, smiled. "It's completely insane, you know."

"That's why you love me."

"Yes, yes it is." I laughed and picked up my bowl from where I'd set it on my lap, and took a bite of the meat and vegetables that constituted dinner. "If he's sitting there, we turn west. if he's moving, we wait. Let's see what Mungke has to say."

The message Zayd sent was a simple, "Do you have a report?"

The answer from him was, "Yes, Tolui is angry about something. He has me packing up his bags and a horse along with a dozen others and is leaving in the morning. He didn't say where."

"I assume he'll bring more bat-people with him," I said, turning to the rest.

Sacha nodded. "If he can fly, then he will ditch the horses or kill them and take off outside Beijing. We had best be ready in three to five days at the most."

I nodded. "Three days is enough time, but we need to start now. Let's go see what we can do for traps."

"What's the plan? Are we capturing or killing? It makes a difference."

I chewed on my lip, tried to separate Tolui my beloved brother from Tolui the Kamil-bearer. "There really isn't any point in capturing him. I don't know if the cup's power will work on a Kamil-bearer, anyway, and I don't even know what would remain of him without Kamil. We need to kill him. My brother is dead, his body is just out walking around still."

"That's all we need to know, then, we can set net traps for the flying creatures and some ground traps that we can spring. I think our biggest asset is probably Temur and that bow, taking them out of the air, and he will become the target once they catch on."

"Which works, if we, say, put him under some traps we can spring once they start focusing on him," I said.

Sacha nodded. "Or to confuse them, we can all look like Temur."

"Or both, for that matter. I have some ideas for illusions that might come in handy. After all, I recall that Jaida scares them."

"True enough, so would the dragon."

Funny how Sabur seemed to recur in both of our minds; my flying form was one I'd copied from the copper dragon, and I'd made enough illusions of him that I could probably do it in my sleep at this point. "That as well. Anything that would keep them distracted allows us to kill them more easily."

"Can you track Tolui with the bracelet?" Sacha asked. "That will give us an idea of how quickly he is moving."

"I should be able to, once he leaves Beijing. I'll go out on Spirit in an hour or so, see if I can pick him up separately."

Sacha chuckled. "He wasn't leaving until morning, and it's my turn tonight. So you aren't going anywhere." He smiled at me, and for the first time since Beijing I felt my heartbeat quicken at the sight. I felt as if I were coming alive once more.

"No, it can wait till tomorrow," I said, laughing.

Sacha and I were gentle with each other that night, and I found there was solace to be found in the touch of hands on my skin, forgetfulness to be discovered in the things that passed between he and I.

In the morning, I went out on Spirit, and found that the nearest artifact was moving very quickly towards me. We had three days, at most. I returned and gave this news to Sacha, who was directing the others in building traps. He nodded, and I joined in the work.

We set up a hide for Temur in the main square of the town, with net traps rigged to fire over it. Sacha and I both built our own complex of traps, to either side of Temur. Nomolun and Zayd would be mobile, both assigned to killing fallen manbats. Zayd's instructions were to fireball the group when the arrived, to start things off.

The third day dawned, and we were as ready as we were going to get. "He was a good fighter, in life," I told the rest. "Chagatai is better, but Tolui was almost as good. Tolui's strength was his mind. A brilliant general, very popular among the people. Expect the unexpected from him."

They nodded, and we split to go to our places. We waited, on edge, and then a scout appeared in the sky, alone. "Shoot that one," I told Temur. Arrows flitted out at my words, and the manbat fell to the ground.

For a long time, there was nothing. Then I heard Zayd's voice mutter, and a purple glow began to outline figures in the sky. He followed that with a fireball, scattering the figures.

Arrows came from us, and I launched my first illusion--Sabur diving at the group. They scattered, and I grinned fiercely.

Then battle was upon us, and all that mattered was that they died.

A few minutes later, we had ten bodies. We should have at least two, maybe three more. And none of these were Tolui. I concentrated on the bracelet. Within a mile. Not moving. There was a sickness in me, a nausea rising, as I ground out the words, "He's gone to ground somewhere. Within a mile. I can't tell what direction."

"Here, sister." I turned in time to catch an arrow in my right shoulder, and another thudded into Sacha's stomach. I saw him double over with a groan. I turned back, and there was Tolui stepping out from a building.

He had not known which one I was, until I had spoken.

And now--

A sword in my left hand, and I was running towards him, heedless of anything else. Draw his fire. Let the others have a chance. More arrows hitting me, shoulder again, two in my thigh, blood staining my clothes. Pain. Emptiness--

Grief.

Something was wrong.

Tolui held his bow to try and block my sword. He was moving so slowly. Something in his eyes. Something was wrong.

My sword entered beneath his ribcage and ran upwards into his heart.

The world went white, and then there was nothing.

I opened my eyes. Nomolun's face was hanging over mine. She was saying something. After a moment, I could make it out. "You all right?" she was asking.

Was I? Awareness was trickling back into my body. Pain, but not acute. "Sore. But I think I'll live. How's Sacha?" I sat up, and winced. Nomolun put her arm around my shoulders, helped steady me.

"Fine, bled a lot but not serious. I have some bad news, though."

Cold washed me. Nomolun's voice was grave. "What?" I asked.

She held my gaze with hers. "He attacked the horses first. Spirit is still alive, I had to use the cup on him, but I couldn't save them all."

I stared. Tried to think. "How many did we lose?"

"Three."

Something about how she'd said that-- I ignored the wave of dizziness that washed over me, and forced numb lips and tongue to ask the question that I dreaded the answer to. "Was Wind one of them?"

Nomolun nodded shallowly. "I am afraid so. He knew her and he took it out on her, and Spirit. I chose to save Spirit."

I closed my eyes, ground my teeth. "Damn, damn, damn. It was the right choice."

"We lost Nightfall and Bell Flight, as well."

Oh, no, no. "Our pregnant mares. Damnit. He knew what he was doing." I got to my feet then, and Nomolun helped me up. I staggered a bit, then righted myself with an effort of will.

"He was a Mongol," Nomolun said. "Zayd found the thorn but left it on him without touching it."

"I'll get it, put it in the box. Then we need to build pyres. First though, I need to go find Spirit." I looked at Nomolun, who was looking concerned. "Did you have to use the cup on me?"

She shook her head. "No, I couldn't. That was just pure talent."

"You do good work, as always." I looked down, and my eyes searched for a moment and found my brother's body. My sword was still lodged in him, and his eyes were open, staring at the sky. The bow had fallen from his hand when he'd gone down. Mine. My kill. The pain of it nearly staggered me, and I gritted my teeth to keep from bursting into tears. I raised my voice. "Zayd, where's he carrying the thorn?"

Zayd was closer than I'd thought he was, just behind me, as a matter of fact. "Around his neck."

I pulled a cloth out of my pocket and knelt. Gently, I ran my hand under the collar of his shirt, as if I were afraid to wake him. My hand felt the leather thong around his neck, and I pulled it out to reveal the thorn. My hand fisted around it, and with a jerk I broke the thong, the thorn coming away in my hand.

I touched the bracelet to it, and heard Ahmad's voice. Vladivostok, tossed into a river of fire that is running into the sea will destroy it.

I did not know where Vladivostok was. Nor did I care right now. I stashed the wrapped thorn in the box and went in search of Spirit.

He was with the horses, watching the humans. I touched him with bloodstained hands, making sure he was all right. Then I leaned into him, slung one arm over his neck, and gave into tears.

His silent voice was gentle. I'm fine now. It was pretty close for a minute there.

I was still crying. I am going to have nightmares about today. And Wind. I was looking forward to seeing what her foal was going to be like. Kamil had Tolui's memories. He knew where to hit me to hurt me.

He did. We will survive and go on. I am sorry for your losses. I will miss Wind too.

I remembered the two of them, how Wind and Spirit would stand head to tail, switching flies off of each other with their tails. She had liked him. I'd never really considered how Spirit had felt about her.

I swallowed tears, forcing them down, and wiped my eyes. "I need to go start helping build pyres. The Khan may decide to send scouts this way, and we need to be gone before they get here. I just wanted to make sure you were all right."

I am fine, he said. Are you going to be?

I shrugged. "I don't know. But I don't have the option to fall apart right now."

His voice managed to be stern without being scolding. You always have the option. You choose to be stoic. They can build fires. Wahb is helping. Stay and grieve. We can run if you like.

"I--" I faltered, and the tears caught me again. Once I was able to speak, I said, "I think going for a run would be a good idea."

Have you found out how to destroy the thing?

"Vladivostok. Tossed into a river of fire. No idea where that is."

North and to the east, about seven days at your usual rate of travel. I was near there, once. I know the way. Seven days for all of you. Seven hours for us. Get your brother, if it's a river of fire we can burn him there.

My voice shook, but the tears seemed to have subsided for the moment. "I will. I'll tell the others where we're going. That's a good amount of time to run."

It's all right. I have run for days before. Seven hours is nothing.

"Well, fourteen total, since I assume we'll be coming back. But I think I need the run," I said. To let the wind blow through me, to let movement ease me. Yes. It would help.

We can rest for awhile and return in a day.

I nodded. "I'll get Tolui's body, and we can be off."

Nobody said anything to me, all apparently understanding what I needed to do. I asked Zayd for some of the fire stuff we'd gotten from the wolves at Kashi, and Nomolun gave me some salve for my wounds. I got together the few things I would need, had the others help me load my brother's body onto Spirit, then kissed both Zayd and Sacha and left.

Spirit ran, and once again my heart expanded as the two of us merged. All I felt, all I was, was hooves pounding on the ground, wind in our faces, silence surrounding us. I did not know where we were going. I did not care.

We ran until we ran out of land to run on, down a long beach and then running in the spray of the surf. The ocean spread out beside us, and from our hooves sand and water sprayed everywhere. Spirit pulled up as we came to a river that flowed into the sea. It had a thick layer of oil on the top, and that oil was aflame.

My mind and Spirit's separated, and I sat for a moment, not truly comprehending the scene. Then I swung down, and pulled Tolui's body off of Spirit, as well as the small pack I'd brought. The thorn would go first. If the destruction of the thorn changed things to that the river was no longer on fire, I would build a pyre for my brother.

I walked to the edge of the river, saw the thick smoke rising off of it. Everything was black, all around me, all of the plants dead and covered in a layer of soot. I coughed as I came to the edge. The acrid fumes stung my eyes.

I had the thorn in one hand, and I hurled it into the river, aiming for the center. It landed in the river, was buoyed by the oil. Then it burst into flames and was consumed in a matter of seconds.

Time stopped, and began to flow backwards.

The river rushed in from the sea, and swallowed smoke and flame as it did so. Trees and plants seemed to unburn, soot disappearing, leaves seeming to burst from fire. The oil disappeared from the river, and then it all stopped. I was left on a beach, on the edge of a peaceful river flowing into the sea. Trees surrounded me, spread up the hills to the west. Animals and birds rustled in the undergrowth.

I stared for many heartbeats, trying to comprehend it. My heart was crowded with grief and guilt, and I seemed to have no room in it right now for much joy. There was some, though, and a certain sense of calm.

I turned back to Spirit, and my eyes sought and found my brother's body. Until that moment, I had not known that I was hoping that destroying the thorn might return him to life, and his soul with him. But, no. He was lifeless as he'd been when I brought him here.

I raised my eyes to Spirit. "I thought I might have to build a pyre."

He changed to human then, and dug in my pack for a blanket. "I can help."

"Thanks. Let's go see if we can find some dry wood." I gave him a wobbly smile, and we departed towards the hills, Spirit wrapping the blanket around him.

We scrounged around for a bit and found enough wood for a fire. I laid the pyre on the beach. I had laid so many in my time, many more than I cared to remember. I knew how to build a good one. Then I carried my brother's body down to the pyre, and with Spirit's help arranged him on it, retrieving my sword in the process.

Then there was nothing to do but pour the burning fluid on Tolui's body, and watch as he began to burn.

Spirit changed back to a horse, and laid down so I could put my back against him. I sang the soul-calling songs all by myself, my cracking voice raised to the stars, my accompaniment the sound of the waves. I sang for my brother, for my mother, for Al Alta in her grave in the Gobi. I sang for the mare that I had raised from a filly, for the foal that had never drawn a breath. I sang for the Nightfall and Bell Flight, as well, and I sang for Sacha and Temur, who were surely grieving them tonight.

I sang for all that I had lost, the family I was unlikely to ever reunite with, the dead, the departed. I sang for my father, now as surely lost to me as my brother had been. I sang for our people, led by a mad mage in the shape of my father.

And I sang for what I had almost lost. For Sacha, for Spirit, for myself, all three saved by the power of the cup. For Zayd, who I'd almost had to put an arrow into to end his misery, in Dien Bien Phu. For Temur, who had been gravely wounded in that same fight, who I sometimes saw rubbing his side on cold mornings as if the scar hurt. For Nomolun, for whom the wounds were to her soul, who feared losing any of us.

I sang until my throat would produce no more sound, until I coughed and tasted blood. I stopped singing then, and watched as the fire consumed the last of the shell that had held my brother, once upon a time. My hands still wore his blood.

After the fire had burned low, I transferred my gaze to the ocean, to the gibbous moon that was rising from the waves. It's so big, I said to Spirit. It goes on forever, doesn't it?

I do not know, he said. I have never heard of anyone reaching the other side. There are rumors of land that way, but nobody's ever gotten there and gotten back.

I looked at the ocean, and at the moon. What happened? I asked. Will you tell me?

It took him a moment to respond. I did not know him at first, he said, in a slow voice. It was only after Wind caught his scent and walked over to him, nose forward, that I realized who he must be. I called challenge, but it was too late. He had her, and he killed her. He was moving quickly, too quickly. He killed Bell and then Nightfall, and then I charged him. I could not allow him to kill any of the rest. It would have slowed you down too much. I felt his sides heave in an equine sigh. I do not remember much after that. A blessing. I do not think we are meant to remember what happens after death.

You were dead, I said. Nomolun had to use the cup. She didn't say you'd died.

A technicality, really, he said.

There was nothing I could say to that. I did not sleep that night, on the beach with Spirit and a dying fire, and the moon rising over our heads. In the morning, we silently departed, going back to the others.

The sun was making its way towards the horizon when we arrived back in Haerbin. Zayd was outside, and nearly ran towards me, catching me up in a hug. "You got back just in time, dinner's almost ready," he said, and kissed the top of my head.

I shook my head. "I'm not hungry." My voice cracked, was not much louder than a whisper.

He released me then, took my shoulders in his hands. His eyes searched my face. "Yesui. Love. You didn't eat before the battle yesterday. I'm betting that despite the fact Sacha tucked some dried meat in your bag, you didn't eat anything last night or today. And from the circles under your eyes, I'm guessing you didn't sleep, either."

I gave him a lopsided smile. "Not as such, no."

"So. You will come with me, and you will eat, and then perhaps I will convince you to make an early night of it." He smiled, gently. "It is my night, if I recall correctly. I will make sure you sleep, even if I have to ask Nomolun to mix something up for you."

"I'm fine, Zayd." I freed myself from his hands, turned away. "Please, don't."

He put his arms around me again, and I gave in and relaxed into his embrace. "I recall several times when you have taken care of me." One hand traced the side of my face. "Light of my life, let me take care of you. You surely need it right now, and that is what we are here for."

It was too much, and I turned my face into his shoulder, sobbing again. After I recovered my composure, Zayd did walk me into the house we were using as a base camp, sit me down, and made me eat a meal. It tasted of nothing to me, but I knew Zayd was right, and I needed to eat and sleep.

The others drifted in as I ate, sitting down, casting curious glances at me. Nomolun put a cup of tea in my hands, and it was a shock to discover that it was sweet, heavy with what must be local honey, rather than salty. "Good for soothing the throat," she said, and I gave her a small smile.

After I'd finished eating, I laid my bowl down beside me. "Tolui's target was not me," I said, my voice quiet and still cracked. "Kamil intended to sacrifice Tolui in an attempt to kill Spirit." I saw Nomolun choke and turn away. "Nomolun?"

She shook her head. "What he did--Yesui, I will tell you what I found, if you ask. Don't ask now. Later. Take my word that he intended it to be permanent, and did what he could to try to make sure that the cup would not work."

My mouth had gone dry, and I nodded. I took a sip of tea; I was almost down to the dregs. "He died far too easily. Tolui was too good of a warrior for me to kill in a head-on fight. I think Kamil abandoned Tolui at the last moment." I shook my head. "Wind knew Tolui. He used to bring treats for her, despite the fact I told him not to. She didn't know that though his scent hadn't changed, he wasn't the person he had been. He wanted to kill the horses, slow us down. So now, we disappear."

Sacha asked, "Where?"

I turned the question over in my mind. "I don't know right now. I'll tell you in the morning, when I know. The Khan will send scouts, and we must leave tomorrow." I drooped a bit. I was so very tired. "I have to--make sure--"

"Not tonight," Zayd said. He got me standing up, mostly carrying me. I felt very odd, as if I couldn't quite control my limbs. Drunk. I felt drunk.

"Something--in that tea--Nomolun?" The question was querulous, and my words were slurred.

"Blame him," she told me, nodding at Zayd. "The honey covered the bitterness of the herbs I used. And helped your throat besides. Sleep, Yesui. The problems of the world will wait until tomorrow."

I felt Zayd bodily pick me up, and then lay me down in something soft. "Sleep, lovely one. I will be here when you wake," he told me. I felt something damp on my hands. He was using a wet cloth to clean Tolui's blood off of them. I tried to protest, but my tongue was tangled and I kept forgetting all my words.

Then I fell down into a deep well, and did not emerge until morning.