aithne | bowling for zombies

Still playing Mass Effect 2. I have traded in my WIZZARD hat for a pointy hat with racing stripes and stitched-on flames, because my Shepard has abruptly become the most dangerous thing on most battlefields. I actually am shooting people less and less; my gun has become something I use while I'm waiting for powers to recharge. And in a couple of notable cases, that's not long at all.

For instance, the Throw skill. For those not familiar with ME, Throw is basically a big ball of energy you toss at enemies to knock them off their feet. It does damage on its own, but really shines when you've got something to throw them into. (Or off of. I love it when people stand on bridges.) It has an extremely short recharge time (especially since I've been throwing a bunch of resources at making recharge times shorter). And when I leveled it up for the last time, I evolved it into Throw Field, which allows you to toss it at groups. When I'm not lobbing Throws at opponents, I'm using other powers to strip them of shields and armor so I can go back to using Throw.

So last night, I was playing through a mission (the IFF mission) and we were fighting our way through a bunch of husks. Husks are basically ME's answer to zombies, and they are Goddamn Bats--low-level critters that like to mob you. A lot. They don't have distance weapons, so they run at you with limbs flailing, groaning and growling. You're in cover? Too bad, because they'll come around behind you and start chewing on you.

I freakin' love husks.

The combination of husks and Throw Field is completely awesome, because with Throw you can make husks fly. Choose a group, lob a Throw into the center, and all of a sudden the air is filled with flailing, cartwheeling zombies. If the ceiling is low, they'll sometimes smack into it and come down in little pieces. I was totally bowling for zombies. You'd think it would get old after a few minutes, but it so did not. I was giggling like an insane person through pretty much the whole mission. And I was actually sad when it was over.

Also, I finally did Zaeed's loyalty mission last night. I don't like Zaeed. At all. But the rest of my crew all have these spiffy coordinating uniforms, so I figured I'd give the guy a chance. Off we went to go deal with the refinery.

Only we get there, and this happens:

Zaeed: Hi, Backstory Dude. Nice refinery you have here. Be a shame if it somehow got SET ON FIRE. (sets it on fire)
Shepard: Whoa, dude, NOT COOL.
Zaeed: Oh, screw you, I'm going after Backstory Dude.
Shepard: No. You're not. (Paragon-interrupt ShepardPunch(!)) Let's go save people.
Zaeed: (grumble)

Okay, that this point, I know I've probably blown the loyalty mission. But! I just picked up a ton of Paragon points, enough to bring me close to 100%, so that's cool. So off we go, getting the fire suppression systems back in order. We shoot some dudes. All is well. So we get outside and Backstory Dude is escaping, and Zaeed keeps shooting the shuttle as it flies away. Cue tantrum.

Zaeed: Twenty-five years of my life WAAAAAAAAAH!
Refinery: Screw you. (drops a beam on Zaeed)
Zaeed: (ignores signs that the universe is starting to resent his presence in it, keeps ranting)
Shepard: (puts a gun to his head) There is room for exactly one big swinging dick on my team, and that is me. I don't need this shit. Shape up, or I will leave your sorry ass here. Under this beam. With an oil fire creeping closer. And I might shoot you in the head for good measure before I leave.
Zaeed: Well, crapcakes. Shaping up it is.

And that is the Paragon (charm) option! I thought I'd flunked the loyalty quest, but I managed to not.

The other thing I've noticed is the vast abundance of Daddy Issues in this game, particularly in the loyalty quests.

Jacob: Can we go see if my dad's still alive?
Shepard: I've read the walkthrough. He's gone all Captain Kurtz. But, if we must.

Miranda: My daddy never loved me. And now I have a genetically identical younger sister who my daddy isn't going to love either.
Shepard: You do know that you sound like a spoiled brat, princess? Seriously. "Daddy gave me everything I ever wanted and made me genetically perfect!" But hey.

Mordin: Have former student. Trapped on Tuchanka. Can we go retrieve?
Shepard: Let me guess. You considered him almost like a son...fine, let's go.

Grunt: Grunt SMASH!
Shepard: ...yeah. Let's see if we can get you fixed up.
Urdnot dude: We didn't like his daddy.
Shepard: Seriously, screw you. Let the kid join up.

Garrus: This guy totally betrayed me and got my men killed. Let's go kill him.
Shepard: Oooookay. A Father To His Men, much? You do know that I'm totally going to talk you out of killing him, because that's what I do, right?

Jack: I want to blow the facility I was raised in sky fucking high. 'Cause my childhood was literally hell.
Shepard: I guess I can get behind that. Besides, that's the only way you get a shirt, and I keep thinking that you look like you're cold. I think your daddy issues are merely a grace note in that magazine rack you have strapped to your back, so I'll let it pass.

Thane: So...I have this son...
Shepard: Uh-huh. You're right, you were sort of a crap dad. Nice to see you trying to turn it around, though. You might be weird as hell, but you're kind of cute.

Samara: I and my Cleavage of Improbability are hunting a serial killer. Who happens to be my daughter.
Shepard: Mommy issues. Well, at least that's different. Seriously, I need to know where you shop for bras. Whoever built yours is a genius. A crazy genius. What? Oh, right, loyalty quest, we'll get right on that.

Tali: I have this thing I need to go take care of...
Shepard: Let me guess. Your father's in trouble?
Tali: ...what are you talking about? I've been accused of treason. I need to go convince the Migrant Fleet that I'm not a traitor.
Shepard: Awesome! Lead the way.
Admirality Council: Tali, your dad's dead, and we think your actions had something to do with it.
Shepard: ARGH.

Fortunately, the main plotline appears to mostly be free of Daddy Issues. So far, at least. We'll see.